Do you remember the first time God felt real to you?

I have always felt God with me. I've felt him for my whole life. I knew he was real. There really isn't one set moment where I just felt God with me, and I had faith. I've always had faith but there have been key moments that made me believe even more.

Over the summer I went to a mission camp with Bre, and a few other friends. The last day of this mission trip I felt God with me, more then I think I ever have before. We were at the closing ceremony and Bre and I were next to each other. We started singing our songs, and we said a prayer. During the prayer we held hands with the people next to us. The whole room did it. After we prayed I herd Bre sniffle a little. I thought absolutely nothing of it. We started another song. Bre reached his hand out for mine, and of course I held it. I felt like I was going to cry. I felt like God was there with me, almost telling me it was ok to cry. I squeezed Bre's hand. He squeezed it back. I sniffled a little and tried to hold back the tears. I looked up at Bre and saw him with tears running down his face. I broke down. Everything I had been holding back that week came out. Bre let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around me. I rubbed his back, and he rubbed mine. I felt God that whole week, but somehow I was overwhelmed with his glory. I was over whelmed by the presence he had in that room. Another reason I think I broke down was because that was the last youth trip I will ever have with Bre. I know that God has a plan for him and for me, but it's hard to see the plan before it happens. I felt God then, and I feel him as I write this blog post. I know I'll look back on this in a few years and probably cry. It's important to share.

God puts people into our lives for reasons that we don't know when they come to us. Bre was put into my life to strengthen my faith. As was Ray. Both of them have strengthened my faith so much more then I could have ever imagined. I love them both so much, and am so thankful for them. I hope each and everyone has some one like Bre or Ray in your lives. No matter what faith you are.

Your sister in Christ,
Cameron-Elizabeth

Passport...... ( Day 1)

My church traveled a few hours to camp in Virginia called Passport. It was my first year going. I was really nervous and worried. I didn't really want to go, but I wanted to really bad. All of the youth got thereon Monday morning and were ready to leave. I WAS SICK! I had a really bad migraine and just wanted to sleep. We all gathered around and made the best of how I felt. I ended up riding with Bre's mom because of how sick I was. We made it about half way and stopped for food. As soon as I got out of her car, I threw up all over the bushes. It was nasty. I couldn't eat anything at all. I drank a little sprite in hopes that it would help, it didn't. I threw up again before we started driving. I threw up all over the car. I felt so bad about it, but she reassured me. She said she's done it before and her kids have done it. She said not to worry about it. We made it to camp. The few people I was in the car with and I were late showing up. We missed the group photo but took another one later. We stood out in the heat for a few minutes which made me feel even worse. I ended up having to go inside and sit down. We got our rooms and I took a nap till dinner. I threw up a few times in between then. My room mates and I went to dinner, I didn't eat anything and ended up getting sick again. We went to the opening celebration and had so much fun. Then we met our groups and hung out for an hour. After that we had church group devotions with our youth group. After that I went to bed. I passed out on a very uncomfortable bed and slept most of the night. That was day one....

Cameron-Elizabeth 🐬

The voice of truth.....

The voice of truth is a song by Casting Crowns. My. Favorite. Band..... There a Christian rock group. I can most definitely say they are my favorite band. The voice of truth is god. He says not to be scared, tells a different story, and says this is for my glory. This is the voice I hear. This song is on my playlist, over and over again. But this isn't really what this post is about.

This post is more about my faith. I am a Christian, I attend the most amazing Baptist church ever. Now here is my story......

I have always been a church girl. My dad attended every Sunday, or at least everyone he could. I went with him every Sunday. I did Sunday school with the kids since I was like 3. I had 2 friends at that church.....2. I started youth group as soon as I could. Still with 2 friends there. When I was in 6th grade, a few months after I started youth, my dad was sick. He hadn't attended for about a month. When he walked in with me the Sunday he came back our preacher had the nerve to say "I didn't know you were still a member." That was the last time we went to that church.

We found another one that our family friends were going to. We went and were welcomed with open arms. The most amazing people. Ever. Everyone came and talked to us, including people we had never met before, and people I had known all of my life. We go there every Sunday, rain or shine. Hot or cold. Sick or well. I can only image where we would be had we not started there. My dad got his transplant 3 weeks after we started there. Let me tell you, those people are the most amazing support system I could have wanted. Not including my sister. I can't admit it to everyone when I'm on the verge of giving up, or about to cry. But the youth there are amazing, and I know I can talk to Bre and Ray no matter what. I have sat down and balled my eyes out with people in that church. I have also shared memories that I will never forget with those people. The people I now call my family. The people I trust to talk to and not be looked down on. I have incredible friends at this church. Friends who I couldn't dream of loosening, ever. I love every kid in youth with me. Not at all like the church we were attending.
After we left the first church I stayed friends with those 2 people. I also ended up becoming friends with 2 more incredible people. One of which only talked to me when he didn't have anyone else, I was his last person to talk to. I am so glad he did though. He was at a very bad point in his life. A point where he really needed someone. I became his someone, whenever he needed me. He is now incredibly happy, he joined the Navy, he has a really amasing girlfriend. We talk all the time now. The second person is someone who is like 6 years older then I am. He is a missionary now, but he contacted me just after he left. Him and I became friends, and I talk to him frequently too. Although I am still glad I left that church.

I won't leave this church. I love them.

I have been through difficult times, times where I prayed and didn't believe. Times where I thought if there was a god he wouldn't do this to a follower. I had a conversation with the most amazing youth pastor I have ever had about this. He told me that if I couldn't handle these challenges, they wouldn't have been given to me. I think that's true. I also wonder though. A preachers son is supposed to know that. He gets taught all of that when he's young. Yet I wonder why he cut his life short. Maybe that was his way of handling it. I just can't seem to understand that. I can't seem to figure that part out. Maybe I'm just not seeing the bigger picture. Maybe I missed something. I just can't figure it out.

I'm in a place right now where I believe. I pray about everything. I wonder when this "trial" is going to end though. This wasn't supposed to be a depressing post. It's really supposed to be happy. I have a church! I belief in god! I'm in a good place faith wise right now! I'm happy!
I write this as I am listening to my playlist that consists of songs by Casting Crowns, Chris Tomlin and Mercyme.